A Catholic website has just posted this gem of an article. In it, they list the ways in which “the end” has come. People who know me well should be quite aware that my tolerance for this kind of ignorant bigotry is growing woefully thin. But what really gets me about this specific piece is that the author can’t seem to support his argument without even contradicting himself - sometimes only one sentence apart.
There are few things as clear in God’s revelation as the sacred institution of marriage between a man and a woman. From Genesis 1 (the marriage of Adam and Eve) to Revelation 21 (the marriage of Christ the Lamb with His Bride the Church) God has had only one model of marriage, and it is not gay marriage.
Seriously, it isn’t really that clear - and it certainly isn’t one model. Is it one man and one woman? Is it one man who had no human parents and one woman who comes from his body? Is it one man and many wives? Is it one man, many wives and some concubines? And hand maidens? And slaves? The only thing which is pretty clear is that we don’t see any marriages between a man and a man in that book - not a clear definition as to what marriage is specifically.
Moreover, I love how the author says in the first sentence “between a man and a woman” and then uses two examples which are quite odd:
Firstly, Adam and Eve were never married. Eve was pulled from Adam’s rib - meaning that she had similar, if not the exact same, DNA as Adam. This would make them related. I don’t feel like digging through Leviticus or Deuteronomy, but I’m pretty sure marrying kin isn’t a “good thing”. I’ll leave the whole “Whom did Cain marry?” argument alone, though.
Secondly, Christ and The Church are not a man and a woman. One is a dude who died a long time ago, and the other is an amalgamation of men and women. If Jesus married the church, then that means he married all the women in the church and the men, too. And the children. Not only does that include gay marriage, but pedo-whatever-it-you-call-it-when-kids-get-married. And does that make anyone who is a Christian then a polygamist for marrying someone alive today? Or is everyone just born a widow / widower?
He’s the one who said that the definition was “clear” and gave those as examples… not me.
The author then goes on to discuss how polygamy / polyamory were done away with - by the church, not the bible, with this bit:
Even polygamy and divorce was [sic] done away with in the Christian Church, as Our Lord reminded all of the essence of marriage as it was “in the beginning.” This Christian view of marriage became the norm of Western society and its most basic societal unit, undoubtedly allowing the West to flourish.
Interesting. So he’s essentially saying that gay marriage is equal to polygamy and divorce. I know that polygamy is illegal, so Western society most likely agrees with him on that. However, he lost me at divorce. And Western society. And, pretty much, reality. Divorce isn’t “the norm” in Western society? Really? A 40 to 50% divorce rate indicates otherwise. Hell, my Christian mother has been divorced twice (once while being a Christian). My father has been divorced thrice. And growing up it wasn’t rare for me to know kids whose parents were divorced. In fact, many of us would joke about the rarity when we would find a peer whose parents were still together.
Funnily enough, people who believe in Jehovah are often getting divorced more often than those who are “godless”. Even the most cursory Google search will show that Christians get divorce more often than Atheists - with Fundamentalists (you know, the people who say every word in their great book is 100% true, and often the loudest voices against gay marriage) at the top of the list. In fact, 90% of the time divorce amongst Christians occurs is after they’ve been saved. After. After. Oh teh ironiez.
So since nearly half of all marriages in Western society - the larger portion of which are professing Christians - end in divorce, a much higher percentage than what gay marriage would be in comparison to non-gay marriage, by using the transitive property on the above notions, we get a super scary result:
Polygamy ~ Divorce = Gay Marriage = End of Civilization.
According to that logic, it looks like Christian Civilization already ended, probably some time in the 70s.
I blame the disco.
